2017 Word of the Year

In my quest to simply EVERYTHING, I've still maintained the Word of the Year trend because it helps keep me focused.

This year my word is: FLOURISH

To flourish is to grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment.

I want to flourish in some very specific areas of my life.

For example, I want to flourish physically. I want to fuel my body well by eating well. I want to be strong and capable so I can keep up with my kids.

I want to flourish spiritually. I need to get back to the basics. To study God's Word and remind myself of who HE says He is.

I want to flourish as a wife and mom. That means spending time investing in these relationships.

The key here is to set up a "particularly favorable environment."

So, how do you do that?

Well, I will be breaking each category down in subsequent blog posts.

Stay tuned!
-kt

New Year

New year.

Refined goals.

Renewed motivation.

This past Monday, we were talking at small group about what brings us delight and rest and how that is present in our current seasons of life.

My response was simply that I'm trying to figure that out.

I have goals, just like most people.
   We gotta get out of debt.
     I desperately want to purge our belongings and simplify our home and schedules.
        There are books to read and recipes to try and projects to get done and the list goes on and on...

I know that I have to have time to find myself, to pursue my passions, to "fill up my cup..."

But, my time is VERY limited.

I am a young wife and mom.

So, the challenge is to figure out what that all looks like practically for me.

Currently, it looks like evaluating.
It looks like ruthlessly purging my life, schedule, habits, mindsets, etc.

If it isn't an absolute necessity or it doesn't contribute to my self or my family or my marriage, it has to go.

I have a lot of likes.
It's time to figure out what I love - and what is therefore worthy of my limited time and energy.

It's going to take some time to figure this all out.
And, I'm ok with that.
There's no rush.
There's no pressure.
There's no reason to compare myself to other moms.
There's no reason to stress out about other's expectations on me (whether legit or imagined).
I can show myself grace because I want to wait until I know for sure what to spend my limited time on.

I want to do things well or not at all.

Until I figure out what those things are, step 1 is to start focusing more inward.
Towards myself.
Towards my marriage.
Towards my family.

Mother Teresa said it best when she said, "If you want to change the world, go home and love your family."

Perhaps we all should take that advice to heart.
-kt

The Cattle on a Thousand Hills

I posted this picture to a Facebook group for Bible Journaling a few months back and the response I got from it was overwhelming! It's even going to be featured in a magazine! I'm so flattered.

My mom was visiting and we stayed up late one night to Bible journal together. This is what happened.

My husband works for a cattle ranching company and I think of this verse nearly every time we're in the car.
He owns the cattle on a thousand hills.
(God does... my husband doesn't)  ;)

Winter on the Ranch

I'm sure I'm not alone in the fact that I am very much looking forward to spring!

Although, I don't think I can justifiably complain about this winter.

The snow has been... scarce.

Growing up in WI and then living in the high country of CO, I am definitely a fan of snow. I love sledding and making snowmen and forts and the big, fluffy flakes and hot cocoa and feeling all warm and snuggly as it's coming down outside knowing that in the morning there will be beautiful new sparkles covering everything.

That only happened a few times here this winter.

So, I'm left in this place of mourning the winter that wasn't, being ready for spring already, and hoping that this isn't foreshadowing to a ridiculously hot summer.

As far as work on the ranch goes, the guys have to feed cows everyday, they spend time hunting the cows' predators to keep the herd safe, they do a lot of corral work (fixing the old corrals and building new ones), and they do a lot of work around the ranch getting things prepared for the busy season.... which starts now.

We are now fully into calving. It's always fun to see all the babies!
I'll have to share some pictures of them soon!
-kt

The Big One

Friday.

A game changer.

The day of the big one.

Our daughter has battled with uncontrolled epilepsy for nearly 3 years.
She will be 4 years old in about 2 weeks.

She had a rough pregnancy, her first seizures on her first birthday, lots of testing and trips to Children's hospital, many different meds and treatments. She is my little hero.

The seizures are normally absence seizures. She looks like she zones out, spots on her face twitch, and just as quick, she comes right back and goes about playing.

But, this one...

This one was on the floor, convulsing, little lips turning blue, mommy calling 9-1-1.

This was scary.

*We're all ok now*

I've started Bible journaling.

I've had some trouble over the past couple of years getting into the Word.
It's hard with all these littles running about to find the time or energy to really study.

This has been a GREAT way for me to meditate on scripture in the midst of mommy hood.

I'm not super confident in my artistic ability.

But, this one, including her sweet little handprints, is one of my favorites so far.

When we were going through our crazy pregnancy with her, we were told we were miscarrying her. I trusted God to do what He saw as best, but I (of course) wanted this child to be healthy and whole and a part of our family.

"For this child I prayed, and the LORD has granted me my petition that I made to him."
      1 Samuel 1:27

In the next verse, Hannah is expressing that, because God saw fit to give Samuel to her, she would give him back to the Lord.

While we were pregnant, my father-in-law told us that our sweet Little Miss would be used mightily for the kingdom of God.

On our bad days, I struggle to see how that can come true, but I'm hopeful. I hope that people can see the way the Lord is giving us hope, the way He is sustaining us, the way He is protecting her and providing for us. I hope people can see that even on my darkest, saddest days, I still trust Him. I've honestly really been struggling, but I know He is good. I know He loves us. I know He cares for her.
I know.

Give us strength to be used by you, Lord.

"For this child I prayed, and the LORD has granted me my petition that I made to him.
  Therefore I have lent him to the LORD.
  As long as he lives, he is lent to the LORD."
       1 Samuel 1:27 & 28

I'm so grateful.
-kt

Dark Days

The dark days.

Sadness.

Pain.

Lack of joy.

Hurt.

Exhaustion.

There's no real reason for them.

Yet, they linger.

My children are beautiful.
My husband is faithful and kind.

Yet, they linger.

I have people who love me, bosses who take care of us, a church family that supports us, family members that are loyal.

Yet, they linger.

I feel like we take one step forward, two steps back.
We stand up, and get tackled.
We make progress and get stopped.

I fear hope.
I resent dreams.
I expect disappointment.

I have moments of "happy" that are preceded and followed by pain.

My body hurts.
I'm so tired.

These are my dark days.

I'm looking forward to the light.
-kt

Why I don't care about Starbucks' cups...

This post could probably also be titled, "Why I'll Never Have a Large Blog Following."

I really only post when I'm fired up about something.

And, in this way-too-easily-offended culture we are living in, I'm sure I tick people off.

But, this morning, I don't care.

My dad sent me an email this morning asking how I feel about the whole red cup controversy.

Frankly, for a person who lives three hours from the nearest Starbucks, I'm probably a little too fired up about it. But, it is what it is. 

I DON'T CARE. 

I don't care that their cups don't say "Merry Christmas."

I don't care that they aren't having Christian symbols anywhere this holiday season.

They aren't a Christian company! Why do we expect them to act like one?

I am a Christian. I was raised Christian. I decided on my own to remain a Christian into my adulthood. I lived overseas as a missionary. I considered myself a missionary to my college and in my work environments. So, you can read all this with that preface. 

I wish Christians would stop expecting non-Christians corporations to act in Christian ways.

So what if their cup doesn't say "Merry Christmas"? 

The jug of milk and loaf of bread that I just picked up at the grocery store don't say that either, but I still bought them. Personally, I don't get offended when the gas station clerk wishes me "Happy Holidays" instead of saying "Merry Christmas." And, seriously, if you can live by only shopping at Hobby Lobby and eating at Chick-fil-A, more power to you.

Perhaps we should stop boycotting places and demanding that others do things OUR way. 

Maybe instead, we SHOULD go into these places and spread some love and joy and peace instead of malice and frustration and anger that our own needs aren't being met exactly how we see fit. 

I honestly don't think Jesus would've cared AT ALL about what his coffee cup said, but I CAN GUARANTEE that he would've brightened up His barista's day. He would have left her feeling blessed and loved. 

(And, by the way, He totally forewarned us that stuff like this would happen. He told us we'd have troubles in this world. We live in a fallen world. Stuff like this should come as no surprise.)

Our response when we face troubles is to be gracious, full of patience, kindness, love. 

Now, to be clear, I do not consider this whole cup nonsense to be anything close to persecution, but I think we can still think about this verse in light of this situation:

"But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts regard Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame." 

                1 Peter 3:14-16

How are we supposed to behave? 

Like people with hope, with gentleness and respect. Not full of malice and demands. Tell me, who is going to be attracted to our lifestyle if this is why we make headlines?

Instead, let's get all riled up about doing good this Christmas. Let's get all fired up about spreading love and joy. Maybe as a church, instead of boycotting a coffeeshop, we should come together and join forces to make sure that no homeless person has nowhere to go this Christmas. Let's make sure that there is not one kid in the foster care system who feels like an outsider on Christmas morning. Let's go buy a whole bunch of those offensive red cups full of cocoa and go visit your local old folks home to spend time with the elderly whose families live far away this Christmas. 

Let's take something that offends us and turn it into something good. 

Spread love.

Do good.

Be light.

For heaven's sake.

-kt