The end...

It's the end of an era.

The Bible tells us that there is a time to mourn...

...this is that time.

I'm turning 30.

BUT, instead of focusing on the fact that my 20's are over and how sad that makes me, I think I need to reflect on all the awesome that took place during these 10 years.

*DISCLAIMER* This is a very personal post. I wrote it more for me... so I won't be offended if you stop reading now.  :)

Year 20
I began my 20's living with the BEST roommates. Women I really admire.

I was dating the man who I would eventually marry.

I was studying a subject that really interested me at a school where I loved the ministry I was apart of.

I was raising support to move to Lake Tahoe for the summer.

I spent that summer with some of the most amazing people I've ever known and that was where God stirred my heart to head overseas.

Year 21
I was able to travel. A lot. All over the States. From the west coast for MPD training, to the South to visit friends, to the Southeast for Spring Break and to visit my sweet Great Aunt.  (Not to mention JesusLand - for real! There were camels and everything!)

And, then I kept traveling. I got on a plane in August and headed to CO for a week followed by moving to the other side of the world. Literally.

Oh the adventures we had! Learning a new language and culture. Exploring. New foods. New friends.  New memories. Priceless. I know I'll never again experience anything like that. I'm so grateful for that time. If nothing else, I feel like I walked away from that year with such a bigger understanding of God and His love for ALL people. Invaluable.

During my time overseas, year 22 started...

Year 22
More traveling, more exploring, more new friends.

Don't mind me looking like a mess... it was humid!

Returning to the States was hard. It was so difficult to bring the person I had become and the experiences I had back to people who hadn't seen me evolve in those ways, and therefore expected me to be the same girl who left. I just wasn't.

Some friendships were strained, others were blossoming.

I got a job I ended up LOVING as a barista at Starbucks. Seriously, best.job.ever.

Year 23
I officially moved to Green Bay.

John proposed.  :)

I graduated from college.

We were planning the wedding while he was living his new-found dream of working with livestock in the mountains.

And, then he returned and we got married!

Year 24
One of the best.

Even though being married brought challenges and we lived in our fair share of crummy apartments, we had an awesome first year.

I was actually using my degree in the Psych world. It was a hard job, but I took comfort in the fact that this was what I trained for.

Some girlfriends and I started our Core 4 - which ended up being one of the BEST things that I've ever being apart of. Ever. I'm so grateful.

New friendships were forming and growing.

I joined the worship team at church.

God was definitely starting to build a foundation of authentic friendships and great leadership in my life. I had no idea.

We moved.

And, apparently I didn't take too many photos...

Year 25
Very shortly after my 25th birthday, we found out we were expecting our first baby.

My Core 4 changed a bit.

I started in a Titus 2 Homemaking Group. Loved every minute.

We moved... again.

We had the Little Mister show up early (but not too early).  :)

I started playing around with a nice camera.

Year 26
I quit my job to stay home with the Little Mister and do in-home childcare.

My Core 4 and I got closer and closer. (That'll happen when you all have your 1st babies within 6 months of each other)

We moved again.

Year 27
Oh, you know, I just ran a marathon. No big deal.

And, then we got pregnant with the Little Miss.

Her pregnancy was pretty rough and we had to say goodbye to my sweet grandmother and my great-aunt.

We made even more memories with our sweet friends.

John got hired on by a camp in Colorado to be their Equestrian Program Manager and we started raising support.

And had the Little Miss.

Year 28
Ev went back into the hospital shortly after my birthday which post-poned our next move temporarily.

Then, we moved... again.

This time it was into my in-law's house so we could save up some money while we raised the rest of our support.

We spent the spring there and then...

...you guessed it. We moved.

Out to CO this time to work as missionaries at a Christian Camp.

We had a blast getting to know our sweet new hometown and the ways of the camp.

We came back to WI for my Gparent's 60th Anniversary celebration and we had Evie dedicated by my Uncle David.

And, guess what? WE MOVED AGAIN.
(but this time it was TOTALLY worth it)  :)

One tough thing from this year: Evie was diagnosed with seizures.

Year 29
I spent a lot of time with the kids at the park and the library, getting to know tourists and locals.

We thoroughly enjoyed the busyness of camp and town.

Friday horse shows were my favorite.

And, we got to play - we snowshoed, hiked 14'ers, camped out, went to the hot springs, explored on horseback, I learned a little more about training horses and was able to contribute to camp by playing photographer.

My family came out to bring my nieces and my cousin's daughter to Horse Camp. They were here for the 4th of July, which is THE BEST here.

We were able to travel back to WI for my grandmother's funeral, the annual family trip with John's family, Christmas and John's grandpa's funeral.

I did have a little accident with the truck, but God provided through it.

Some sweet friends came to visit.

SURPRISE! We moved again! This time onto camp property.

We also added a little lady to our family.

So, I guess, all things considered, saying goodbye to my 20's isn't the worst thing.
I've come a long way... and I've had awesome friends and family on this journey with me.
I'm so grateful.

And, I'm excited to see what my 30's will bring!
I guess we'll see!
-kt

The day I didn't die.

This past weekend I had one of the most terrifying, humbling, nightmarish experiences I have ever had.

I lost control of my pickup truck on a snowy mountain pass in CO and went nose-first over the edge of a mountain cliff, rolling the truck until it eventually stopped in some trees.

I was heading to Denver to pick up my d-group from my summer project in Lake Tahoe (that was 9 1/2 years ago) when the snowy pass bested me.

I was going slow and being SO careful. I was doing everything my husband taught me. I loved that truck. Cars, trucks, all sorts of vehicles were flying past me over the pass no problem. I don't know, maybe I was being too careful.

The truck hit a slick spot and started to swerve. The brakes, turning the wheel, nothing… nothing helped. 

I suddenly found myself sliding uncontrollably toward the cliff, nose first. 

The nose went over and I went right down with it. The grade of the cliff was so steep that the truck started to roll, driver's side first. Then I was upside down, then on the passenger side, then upright again. 

I don't know if I rolled again or not.

What I do know is that I (fortunately) finally settled in some trees, on my tires, upright and thinking, "Oh my God, I have to get out of this truck. Get me out of this truck!" 

It was braced in some trees, but I was unsure if the truck was going to break the trees and keep rolling.  

It's SHOCKING how many thoughts can flash through your brain when in an emergency situation.

Praise God for adrenaline.

My mind went to my husband's advice for traveling through the mountains and I knew my best bet would be to find an ID, my water bottle and my phone (even though we don't have reception over the pass) and get back up to the road to wave down some help. Luckily, all of those things were within my reach along with my backpack that had emptied when I flipped. I threw those things in there and climbed up (because of the angle of the truck) to the passenger side door. 

It would only open about an inch but no more. With EXTREME care, so as not to shake the truck, I climbed into the backseat and tried to get out that door but it would not open either. My last hope was the small sliding window along the back. I slid it open, climbed onto the bed of our truck, shimmied down the back and using the right back tire, hopped off and landed in snow up to my knees.

Then, I dropped my phone.

Not surprising since I was shaking so bad and constantly repeating over and over, "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, OH MY GOD." 

You can feel emotionally alone, but let me tell you, there is no more lonely feeling then standing knee deep in snow, next to your destroyed pickup (that probably just saved your life), without your cell phone, while oblivious drivers are safely in their vehicles passing out of sight above your head. And, not one human knows where you are.

It was morning. It was cold. No one had their windows open to hear my screams for help.

I begged God to help me find that phone quickly.

By His grace, He immediately answered that one.

Then my concern was being seen/heard.

Every stick/tree I grabbed pulled out. Every rock I grabbed slid down. 

I had been trying to keep my hands as dry as possible to avoid freezing but quickly realized that survival depended on digging into the snow and scaling up this cliff.

I was almost to the road, but slipping, so when I heard a vehicle approaching I reached as high as I could and waved, screaming, "Help me!"

When that car had passed, I used all of my remaining energy to get the rest of the way up and I saw that driver with his backup lights on.

At this point, I'm back on the road, covered in snow and as this man gets out to help, my emotions overwhelm me. 

Hysterically, I try to answer his questions and he calls 911. 

I'm saying over and over, "Oh my God! I just rolled my truck down the mountain!"

The operator speaks to me. More people stop to help. I'm talking, I'm breathing heavily, trying to make sense of this and to grasp my current reality. I look down at my truck and lose it again. I'm nauseous. I'm grateful. I'm terrified.

All I wanted to do was get down from that pass, but no one had the intention of taking me anywhere until the emergency crews came. 

The fire chief showed up and had me warm up in his truck.

Each man told me that in these situations, they are normally extracting a body, not standing next to the driver chatting about what happened. I am lucky to be alive and unharmed.

Then came the fire trucks, you know, in case mine burst suddenly into flames.

We were so remote, it took the tow trucks about an hour to arrive.

And then, because my truck is such a beast, it took two tow trucks to bring it up anyway!

I don't even know how long traffic was backed up for. It felt like an eternity.

When my poor truck was finally back on solid ground, I snapped some pictures.

I truly believe it saved my life. What a tank.

(It doesn't even look that bad, but apparently there is a bunch of damage to the under carriage.) 

Right before they had to hook up the 2nd truck to finish the job.

I was speaking with my dad this morning when he mentioned that there are so many things to be thankful for.

Just to name a few of the ways God was good to me through this:

• I never hit my head or blacked out.
• My truck rolled on it's side, not end to end.
• The side windows stayed intact, not shattering all over me or making it treacherous to climb out the back window.
• The trees stopped me without going through any windows.
• My seatbelt kept me right where I needed to be.
• Because there was no front end collision, my airbags didn't deploy.
• John had cleaned out the truck so my friends would have plenty of room so there weren't many things flying around with me that could've injured me.
• This one is weird - we lost Jake's Soc. Sec. card on his first day of school. I found it in the passenger door at the impound lot. (SO RANDOM)
• The people who stopped to help me actually had cell reception. 
• My husband, my children, my friends were not with me. 
• No one else was close enough for the truck to take them out with me.
• I didn't get cut on any glass. 
• I had grabbed my best winter coat in an off-the-cuff decision because I thought maybe my friend from Florida would be cold.
• The State Trooper that came for me has a wife and kids my age and he was very professional and kind and made me feel like he was going to make sure to take care of me. 
• One of the first vehicles that my accident stopped was a truck with flashing lights from the set of The Fast and the Furious 7 that was filming on the pass. She was able to use the lights to warn traffic that they had to stop for us. 
• I was able to share a lot about my faith, my life, and camp with the men who came to my aid. The State Trooper, fire chief and tow truck guys should have no doubt that I believe God spared me and isn't finished with me here yet.

My friends were very gracious and rented a car to drive here. We ended up having a wonderful weekend catching up and being able to speak encouraging and challenging words to one another. I love having friends like that. I love that these sweet friends took all the time and effort to get here so we could all be together for the first time in about 4 years. I feel blessed that I have more time to be with people I love. 

I'm only a little stiff in my joints. I have headaches and feel dizzy often and I kind of feel like some words got knocked out of my head sometimes… but I'm all in one piece!

I'm also having a hard time sleeping. My brain replays it all over and over and I'm having some scary dreams. I don't want to be the person who is too afraid to travel on the highway where they had an accident… but geez.

(What are some scriptures you cling to when trying to overcome fear? Please leave a comment with tips!)

The Little Mister went to Sunday school and, after they did their scheduled project, he asked camp's CEO (who was teaching that day) if he could draw our truck being towed. 

I'm actually really afraid that this is going to be hard on him. He loved that truck, too.

For now we are dealing with the insurance company and the reality that we don't have any vehicle we can call our own. There is literally no way we can pay for a vehicle (which is why we currently only had one).

So, as usual, we are in a place where we are waiting on God's provision.

He provided a way for me to stay safe in our truck and to get off that mountain with only a few tiny pieces of glass in my hand and one in my cheek (that didn't even leave marks). Now I just have to wait to see how He's going to provide for us this time!

I hope this post finds you well (and safe!)

-kt